Thus, the way that I will distinguish spirituality and religion is this: Spirituality is to believe that at one's core, you can tap into a guiding force of Love and that there is a powerful life force (whatever you call it) that moves us in the direction of healing and wholeness.
The “freeze” fear response in religious trauma
The freeze response may occur in a religious context when people feel stuck or trapped in a harmful situation and they don't see viable options before them to get out or find safety. This could be anything from sexual, narcissistic, financial, or emotional abuse being perpetrated on church members, to simple faith deconstruction like questioning whether hell is real in a system where this is prohibited.
The “freeze” trauma response from the pandemic and politics
We have officially reached the anniversary of Covid being declared a pandemic. If, over the past year (or more) you have found yourself numb, detached, checked out, unmotivated, and in a word, frozen: then this post is for you.
The Please / Appease Trauma Response
The response you probably didn't even know existed. Today we are going to talk about an often-overlooked trauma response that is near and dear to my heart: the Please / Appease response and how it shows up in religious and political climates.
Purity culture and parenting after deconstruction
Anybody else raised in purity culture? You know, no sex before marriage, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, purity rings, really awful metaphors about how premarital sex degrades girls' value, belief that girls' bodies cause boys and men to stumble, etc... (*raises hand*). If you were raised in 90s and early 2000s evangelical culture like I was, you know it's a whole lifestyle. And often, a cause of much shame and trauma*.
Ideologies of fear vs love
Joe Biden is President. Kamala Harris is a historic Vice President. A 22-year-old poet stole all our hearts, and she referenced Micah and vines and fig trees like I did a couple weeks ago! When I grow up can I be her, please? Executive orders are being signed, an impeachment trial is being planned, all … Continue reading Ideologies of fear vs love
Writing a Book!
I began writing my spiritual memoir back in 2013, writing that now feels like the AOL / dial-up internet version of the book I am working on now. I have been transforming those memoir pieces into a book that examines fundamentalist evangelical Christianity and how it so frequently creates trauma in its adherents.
Thoughts on the New Zealand massacre from a counselor
He was learning that the Qu’ran was filled with commandments to kill the infidel and about jihad and that Muslims were dangerous, bad people.
Why I specify LGBTQ friendly on my counseling profile
I have decided to not be a “wolf in sheep’s clothing” but rather to be out of the closet about what I stand for. This is especially important in the context of a Christian counseling practice, where others might easily assume things about my beliefs.